It's a......

BABY! We didn't find out. I'll admit, it was hard. Jason reallllly wanted to, and I was about to give in. The ultrasound tech never asked, and neither did we. We now have an official surprise baby in late April/early May. I won't lie, I looked. with both Ashley and Davey it was obvious. Since this tech never even seemed to look for it, I couldn't tell. At one point while she was doing leg measurements I thought- it's a boy!- but she then pointed out the umbilical cord. Not a penis. Throughout the various measurements I tried to see any hint and sometimes I thought GIRL and others maybe boy. All in all, I think maybe girl. We had enough leg shots where a penis should have been obvious, but no direct inbetween the leg looks this go round. It was by far the longest ultrasound I have ever had (almost 45 minutes). Baby looked perfect and everything measured between 18w5d and 19w5d. We had a doctor's appt afterwards and really chatted about Papp-A. She reiterated that there is not an additional worry about chromosomal abnormalities and is 100% onboard with making sure I make it home before delivery a priority. Basically the plan is to monitor just in case my placenta starts to crap out and if there is any indicator of an issue, send me back to NC asap. I like her.
In other news we go home in 4 DAYS!!! Please come visit me. I will have no car. :)

Inadequate

You know the moms who make you feel like you are failing as a mother? The ones with amazingly clean houses-all the time? The ones with well behaved, well dressed, CLEAN children -all the time? (You know-no snot, dirt, unidentified food on their shirts, etc.) The ones who never ever yell, make everything from scratch, and don't feel the need to lock themselves in the bathroom and curse every-so-often? (The ones who don't have children who rip chunks of hair out of their siblings head like my son just did?) They live in hotels too. There is a very sweet mother who lives here with her FOUR children. (In the same, tiny 2 bedroom hotel suite my family lives in.) Her four kids (all under 7) are perfectly well-behaved at the breakfast buffet, I have yet to witness a yell from her, and I have never seen her looking like she wanted to give one (or all) of them away. I once mentioned to her how excited I was to go back to my house because living in a hotel was making me twitch with my two kids. I expected her to agree, but get this folks- SHE LOVES IT. Say what??? Four kids, 700 sq feet, and it's all peachy keen. She has to be lying, right???
(Honestly, she is very nice and I am generally in awe of her mothering skills. I just can't understand the love of hotel living. It is beyond me.)

On a different note, this age - two and three- has been the hardest stage so far for me. I am beginning to wonder if where and how we are living now is making me feel that way. My two kiddos, while they fight and bicker a lot, really do play nicely together. If they had more space, toys, and the freedom to be really loud, would I be loving this age? Hmmmm....

We are coming home in 10 DAYS!!! Get ready Charlotte :)